11g, west mambalam




To travel in a Bus in chennai is in itself an experience.. and if you are caught in the peak hours, man!! you are really in for something. Many a times you pay the ticket for just one leg and one hand of yours travelling inside the bus. One good thing about the Busses in chennai is that the last row is exclusively for women, and for those who travel on the footboard you can simply drool through your journey.

That thursday morning I had my colleague's 'Pulp fiction' Cd(a 1994 blockbuster movie) to carry back to office. As usual I found a place for my left leg inside the bus and my 'Pulp Fiction' found its place on this girls's lap who was at the window as I couldn't hold it with me hanging. Two stops away the girl got down giving me my CD and a smile, that I thought I had seen somewhere.

The next day again, I had Tom hank's 'Philedelphia' (a wonderfully made movie.. take my word its sensitive and beautiful) with me and found just enough place for my left shoe on God knows who's right shoe and a place for my Cd at the window seat. Two stops down, the Bus is a little less crampier and then I get the CD from a familiar hand. Wait!! hadn't I seen this bracelet somewhere? that familiar smile confirmed it. And guess what? she even bid me a 'Bye'.

After long I thought I had seen a face that stuck to my head, she looked - may be 'Pretty'? just out of teens, not very fair, a little short, not a face that grabs your attention, but a face that lingers on..and it did with me through the day.

On Saturday morning I had Marlon Brando's 'God father' in my hands and this time I didn't forget to look at the now familiar window seat. She was there smiling as usual even as she took the CD from me. I understood I must have stamped someone more than once looking at the last row when I heard him howl at me. I thought damn! and went on as she kept giving me the smile at definite intervals. Two stops down, she squeezes out of the bus, hands over the Cd and says "Excuse me!! why dont you ever travel inside a bus? why dont you be a little more careful about yourself? " with a mock anger on her face. I was like Bah!! Nothing came out my mouth except what I thought was a stupid grin. And then she sports her trademark smile, bids me a bye, walks away..Believe me if only I wasn't late for my work i swear I would have walked her way.

Monday came and this time I took my planner (which had my visiting card on it!!) with 'Godfather III', spent more time on my dress and my hair than usual, went to the bus stop earlier than usual and waited for my (her)bus. The first bus I thought was too early for her timing. She wasn't there on the second one, the third either, and the fourth one had everyone staring at me as I went one end to the other searching for that lost smile.

It was 10.30 when I reached my office an hour late than usual tired and draining . The day was busy but still the smile managed to find gaps and barge my head. The whole week had my colleagues asking me If something was wrong and why I was late. I had no answer, except what I thought was stupid grin. Its been a fortnite since but I still miss a bus or two with that stupid hope of seeing that smile again for God knows why.

"unnai adigam ninaipathillai, anal moochu vidum tharunam mattum eno ninaivukku vanthuvidugirai" ethuvum kadan vangina kavithai than.. enge padichennu nyabagam valrale... rendu naal parthathukku enthe effectannu kekatheenge.. chumma oru kodu podamnule athukkuthan..

She..

Call it the Irony of life, harsh words on a hot summer afternoon, not in the worst sense the best fare of a first time date. But it was for me my first taste of a date on the 23rd of august, 2000. That was the first time I spoke to a cute small HER, asking her why she was dozing in the class. All I had for the answer were a few harsh words. From harsh words to casual talks, casual talks to serious senseless conversations, from foes to friends, times moved on for me. Five years since and miles away from her I am sitting here wondering how time has changed our destinies.
In these years many a times she has asked me why and how much I love her.. Should there be a better reason except that she loves me ? and it is as much as you love me.. just like you cannot fathom how much you love me.. I too cannot.. There were days when I used to wonder is this just a game of life and my age ? but when I think of her now and miss her, and when it chokes my breath, I suddenly seem to realize how much she has become a part of my life, my breath.
And here I am, writing to a no one my life's woes. Whatever, I still feel it is lovely to be loved, to be cared by someone who before some years was not even known to you!!! understood by someone you never even imagined existed a few years before!!!
It was wonderful while it lasted.. I only wish it wasn't a part of my past...

"En eruthi oorvalathil malargalai thoovungal, Aval pinchu pathangal ange varakoodum".
- en nanban oruvanoda kavithai... thanks machan!!!

Concern

Yesterday I was at the TVS bus terminus on the Mount road wearily waiting for my bus when my eyes caught up the silhoutte of a man who was walking on the pedistrian crossing even as the vehicles were given the green. Heavens!! He is hit by a speeding car,while i was still wondering if i was really awake. He was thrown away atleast a few yards and would have been run over if only the bus behind had not stopped to a screeching halt.

The crowd at the terminus scrambled around this man who was now soiled with his blood and the mud on the road. No one really was ready to lift him, he was still breathing and adjusting his scantily clad brawn. In the mean time the car that had hit him sped away silently. A police man rushed in and forced an auto to halt even as atleast five other autos had sped away at the sight of this man lying on the road.

I along with this cop and another guy shoved (we did shove) this man in to the auto. And when the policeman wanted a mobile to reach his control room the hotspot (as one of the mobile operators christened spencers) had no mobile phones. One lone guy offered his mobile but the control room was not reachable. when the call got through there was no good response which was clear from the desperate cop's voice. The autowala who must have just crossed his teens was already impatient and telling people of his woes.

Through all this I couldn't help noticing a girl hooked on to her mobile giggling through her conversation. The police man had to get on with his work at the signal as the traffic was getting congested and the auto was stranded in one corner with the victim still wincing in pain.

The crowd grew thinner and in five minutes the auto was alone with neither the cop, nor the auto wala around. Through all the noise on the road I could hear this man inside the auto grunting and moaning with pain. After almost half an hour and the man still in the auto, like everyone else I sneaked on to a bus and tried erasing the sight off my thought.

The Night came and went and I still am not even able to clear those dashing headlights from my eyes. When in the morning I got on to my bus I could swear every around me seemed to resemble the man I had seen on the road.